3. so i know i said

so i know i said
suffering isn't necessary
to live a meaningful life, yet;
and i said he didn't need to cheat
to teach me how to love, and yet;
and kicking me between my legs
for fighting my brother
was excessive, at best, yet;
and describing the shape of my eyes
when i 
tried to learn the sound of my voice
for the first time was unjust, and yet;
and my physics teacher didn't need to 
mock my attendance
record in front of the class
when kids made me dread waking up
much less going to school and pretending to 
laugh, and yet;
and all the times people hurt me flashed
back when i slept
so that my eyes drooped over my tests
and risked my scholarship
and all the second
chances 
i've been given, and yet;
i want to think it all was worth it
when this morning she said she wanted to die 
i knew to say,
"and yet,"