2. july fourth is not a celebration here in China

july fourth is not a celebration here in China
at first, i was relieved to be
relieved of pretending that my country fights
for chinks, homos, sluts, me
but then was stunned too by the 
plodding normalness of the day
no one more drunk on prepaid patriotism
on this tuesday
than any other
the sky was unlit by fireworks
streets unpainted with red, white, or blue
outside was the usual rain, 
exhaust, beery breath of the 
huang pu river tracing a lopsided 
smirk into indifferent streets
july fourth feels safe here      comfort is rice wine wrinkling my peripheral vision 
as
black boy holding a pen downtown &
girl hitting a durham bar take a shot 
no one hears anywhere 'round the world

today, someone asked me if i am from here,
if my parents are from here,
& where the hell then am i from anyway