19. my grandma disappeared into the crook of her elbow

my grandma disappeared into the crook of her elbow
i stayed perfectly still
though a better granddaughter might have followed 
into the rabbit hole 
endless, inevitable, dark as it is
but such a place that makes my grandma say,
"i'm so tired,"
is beyond the limits of my courage
maybe (could it be?)
​my love

summer palace. beijing, china.