5. ADHD

​ADHD
​is the "no ragrets" on my chest
the ill-timed joke that sounded better in my head
the reason why i can't break into my own
locker, though i knew the combo
yesterday
it's the mistake i will make but won't learn from
​the shitty first draft that you read
and the revision i swore i'd rewrite and then
forgot to turn in again 
it's like all those promises i left unkept
and things i wished i'd said
that i only thought of later alone in the dark
hiding curled up in my bed
it's all those times i added instead of multiplied
since i didn't read the directions
the high after getting four wisdom teeth pulled
the unmedicated laugh on my lips
it's why Allie Brosh stopped blogging
when the sun stopped waking up
why the clown house houses all the mirrors
that still knows me when i come
it drags me along to its music
and when i start to dance
it's only then that i realize that i can turn 
my demons into my friends